You Know You Play Too Much Halo When:

- You keep trying to pick things up by walking over them.
- You find yourself blocking entranceways with vehicles.
- Your wife starts asking who Cortana is.
- You are able to stand on someones head without them realising it.
- You steal random flags.
- You've considered making a map of your workplace. (Dan!)
- You hum the Halo theme while running down the beach.
- You're surprised when you walk outside and can't see the other side of the planet in the sky.
- You prefer chryo-tubes to beds.
- At the end of the day you mutter to yourself: "G.G. man, G.G."
- You look for the index in a public library
- Your computers' text-to-speech voice is set to the closest thing you find to Cortana.
- You get lost while driving and wait, expecting Cortana to tell you where to go.
- You wake up next to Master Chief.
- Your 'mean names' for people include "modder", "camper" or "noob"
- You drive recklessly, thinking you'll respawn if you die.
- You nod your head whenever you talk to someone.
- You jump off a cliff just to see the funny animation of you falling.
- You attempt to change lanes on the freeway by strafing left.
- The side of your van reads "Echo 419".
- You've referred to your parents/boss as "the Hierarchs" more than once.
- You find this list humurous.

I wrote the bolded ones!

"Duh"

While I admit to not reading a lot of well...anything really, when I do it's usually some book Lindsey has just finished and is talking about. One of her favorite writers, Ann Coulter, is always a treat to read because of her sarcasm. (Those of you who read Lindsey's blog know now where she gets it.) Anyway, this is an "Ann" article passed on to me from my father:

However the Duke lacrosse rape case turns out, one lesson that absolutely will not be learned is this: You can severely reduce your chances of having a false accusation of rape leveled against you if you don't hire strange women to come to your house and take their clothes off for money.

Also, you can severely reduce your chances of being raped if you do not go to strange men's houses and take your clothes off for money. (Does anyone else detect a common thread here?)

And if you are a girl in Aruba or New York City, among the best ways to avoid being the victim of a horrible crime is to not get drunk in public or go off in a car with men you just met. While we're on the subject of things every 5-year-old should know, I also recommend against dousing yourself in gasoline and striking a match.

Everyone makes mistakes, especially young people, but the outpouring of support for the victims and their families is obscuring what ought to be a flashing neon warning for potential future victims.

Whenever a gun is used in a crime, there are never-ending news stories about how dangerous guns are. But these girls go out alone, late at night, drunk off their butts, and there's nary a peep about the dangers of drunk women on their own in public. It's their "right."

Yes, of course no one "deserves" to die for a mistake. Or to be raped or falsely accused of rape for a mistake. I have always been unabashedly anti-murder, anti-rape and anti-false accusation — and I don't care who knows about it!

But these statements would roll off the tongue more easily in a world that so much as tacitly acknowledged that all these messy turns of fate followed behavior that your mother could have told you was tacky.

Not very long ago, all the precursor behavior in these cases would have been recognized as vulgar — whether or not anyone ended up dead, raped or falsely accused of rape. But in a nation of people in constant terror of being perceived as "judgmental," I'm not sure most people do recognize that anymore.

It shouldn't be necessary to point out that girls shouldn't be bar-hopping alone or taking their clothes off in front of strangers, and that young men shouldn't be hiring strippers. But we live in a world of Bill Clinton, Paris Hilton, Howard Stern, Julia Roberts in "Pretty Woman," Democratic fund-raisers at the Playboy Mansion and tax deductions for entertaining clients at strip clubs.

This is an age in which the expression "girls gone wild" is becoming a redundancy. So even as the bodies pile up, I don't think the message about integrity is getting through.

The liberal charge of "hypocrisy" has so permeated the public consciousness that no one is willing to condemn any behavior anymore, no matter how seedy. The unstated rule is: If you've done it, you can't ever criticize it — a standard that would seem to repudiate the good works of the Rev. Franklin Graham, Malcolm X, Whittaker Chambers and St. Paul, among others.

Every woman who has had an abortion feels compelled to defend abortion for all women; every man who's ever been at a party with strippers thinks he has to defend all men who watch strippers; and every Democrat who voted for Bill Clinton feels the need to defend duplicity, adultery, lying about adultery, sexual harassment, rape, perjury, obstruction of justice, kicking the can of global Islamo-fascism down the road for eight years and so on.

This is crazy. (I can say that because I've never been diagnosed with a psychiatric disorder. Although I did test positive for "Olympic fever" once.)

In no area except morality would a sane person believe he can't criticize something stupid because he's done it. How about: If you've ever forgotten to fill up your car and run out of gas, you must forevermore defend a person's right to ignore the gas gauge. Or if you've ever forgotten to wear a coat in cold weather and caught a cold, henceforth you are obliged to encourage others not to dress appropriately in the winter.

This deep-seated societal fear of being accused of "hypocrisy" applies only to behavior touching on morals.

But we're all rotten sinners, incapable of redemption on our own. The liberal answer to sin is to say: I can never pay this back, so my argument will be I didn't do anything wrong.

The religion of peace's answer is: I've just beheaded an innocent man — I'm off to meet Allah!

I don't know what the Jewish answer is, but I'm sure it's something other than, "therefore, what I did is no longer bad behavior" — or the Talmud could be a lot shorter.

The Christian answer is: I can never pay this back, but luckily that Christ fellow has already paid my debt.

------------------------------------------------------------------------
COPYRIGHT 2006 ANN COULTER
DISTRIBUTED BY UNIVERSAL PRESS SYNDICATE

Why Download This Mario Bros. 3 Cover Album?

1. It's by Akihabara Electric Circus.
B. It's actually is pleasant to listen to.
3. It's fun.
5. It's free.
4. You will have infinite lives.
4. If you're here you have nothing better to do anyway.
8. The numbers in the list are screwed up.
6. I'll be taking it down later.

download [46.3 MB].

Name Fun

1.YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet and current street name)
Shadow Second (eh..)

2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME: (grandfather/grandmother on mother's side first name, favorite candy)
Kirk Twix (strange)

3. YOUR "FLY GIRL/GUY" NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name)
J-Sam (sucks)

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite animal, name of high school)
Puppy Greenwood (stupid)

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)
Thomas Milton (sounds soapish)

6. YOUR OPPOSITE SEX NAME: (name of dad/mom, cell phone Company you use)
Bonny Verizon (uhh, no)

7. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (first 3 letters of your last name, last 3 letters of mother's maiden name, first 3 letters of your pet's name)
Samhemjax (haha)

8. PORN STAR NAME: (middle name, street you grew up on)
Thomas Coastal (haha again)

9. YOUR FASHION DESIGNER NAME: (first word you see on your left, favorite restaurant)
Canopus Damons (maybe it's Italian)

Random Thoughts

Oh, goodness. Wednesday Lindsey and I were out all day doing our own things. She went to her Mom's to hang out and go shopping at the outlets so they could use the gift cards they received from Lindsey's shower & her mom's birthday. I went with Dad to a sales call in Horsham, PA. After picking her up, we went home to find that the dogs had finally figured out that they can dig underneath the fence.

Now, if the backyard gate were stronger I wouldn't care. Heck, I might even leave them out if that were the case. But it's not. It's a hundred years old and they already pushed the latch open once while we were home, so this event scared the crap out of me.
I yelled at them to get back in the kennel. And they wiggled and waited anxiously for me to open the door. I wanted to see them crawl back through the hole so I kept yelling and pointing. They got the message and went army style on their elbows under the fencing. It was actually really funny looking. But I was so worried about them getting out into the street that I kept my tone stern. (Those fatherly instincts kicking in I suppose.)

If you were to walk into our house right now you'd think a baby lives here already. Toys, chairs, animals, balloons, it's all here. I think that we might finish painting his room this weekend. I'll have to post some pictures once its completed.

I saw the first Narnia film. I'm on the fence about whether it was great or just good. The CG was amazing so I guess it was amazing? King Kong was another one that I thought was well done. Long, but good. I seem to like stories about people going where their not supposed to be. (ie: LOST, King Kong)

Linz and I are planning one last date night before D-Day. Grotto's & Rita's. Now you Pennsylvania readers may not know what Grotto's is, even though there are a few in PA. Grotto Pizza was founded right here in good ol' Rehoboth Beach, Delaware in 1960. Grotto may mean "“cave"” in Italy, but in Delaware it means pizza. Not cave pizza, just pizza. Anyway, it's the only thing that I've ever heard Lindsey say she had a craving for so we're going. Plus it's right on the shore, and you can't beat that.

Oh, Lindsey had her baby shower last weekend! It was cool. She asked me to stay there for it because events where she is the main attraction make her really nervous, so I tried my best to calm the nerves.

I just obtained Rascal Flatts new album. Amazing.

That's all for now, time to relax a little with the wife...while I still can.